The Kristen Stewart Diaries — Almost Holding Hands with Robert Pattinson in Paris

WARNING: This post contains language that you may find offensive. Please use your own discretion.

A Fictitious Entry that Chronicles the Thirst of Kristen Stewart aka Bella Swan for Robert Pattinson aka Edward Cullen

F—k! F—k Paris! The place is f—ing dangerous! I dunno what it is about Paris, but, it’s making me f—ing amorous or something, like, I feel f—ing romantic all of a sudden, like, I feel squishy like a marshmallow! F—k man!

Maybe it’s the f—ing air! Yeah, like, maybe I should stop breathing! Yeah right! Man, I’m getting really romantic here, like, I know Rob and I agreed no touching in public, but hey, this isn’t exactly public. We’re walking on a f—ing tarmac in the middle of the damned night. Like, who’s to f—ing see if I just put my hand on his elbow? Nobody, that’s who!

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Leaving Paris France After New Moon Publicity -  10 November 2009

Oh man! This is not working! It’s not enough! I wanna hold his f—ing hand! F—k! Why did the private jet park so far away? Wait, what if I slide my hand down, like, in a sneaky way or something? Casual. Be cool, Kristen. Do it real slow so he won’t notice almost.

Okay. Made it. Pretty good so far. Maybe Rob won’t notice if I caress him with one finger. Oh f—k! Man, I wanna hold his hand so f—ing badly!

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Leaving Paris France After New Moon Publicity -  10 November 2009

S—t! I’m going f—ing insane here! This is f—ing idiotic, I know, but… F—k! His skin is so warm! I love his f—ing hands! The way they’re so much bigger than mine… The way they stroke my skin… The way they hold me firmly…

S—t, I’ve dug my nails into his hand! Oh God! I can’t help it! I want him so damn much! Let me just hold his hand, please! Where is that f—ing plane?!

Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart Leaving Paris France After New Moon Publicity -  10 November 2009

Photo Credits

Photos Courtesy of RadarOnline.com
Photos: x17online.com

Thanks to all the excited emails from numerous ATK readers to let me know about the existence of these photos. :D

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