Drink Twilight Daily to Avoid Renesmee Monthly

WARNING: You may find the subject matter of this post offensive. Please use your own discretion.

SEQ 01. EXT. City Sidewalk. Early morning. Two women are chatting as they walk. One of them is pushing a stroller with a baby.

WOMAN 1 (With stroller and baby)
Did you ever miss your Twilight?

WOMAN 2
So far, no. I’ve set my phone alarm to go off to remind me. Besides, Ben and I have talked about it already, so we’re both committed to not having any yet.

WOMAN 1
So when?

WOMAN 2
Maybe after a couple of years of being married. I mean, we just celebrated our first monthsary a couple of days ago.

WOMAN 1
It’s gonna totally change your life!

WOMAN 2
That’s why. Hey, I need to restock my Twilight. Can we pass by the drugstore?

SEQ 02. INT. Drugstore counter. Early morning. The two women are chatting as they wait.

WOMAN 1
What do your parents say about making them wait for a Renesmee to spoil?

WOMAN 2
They’re not the ones who are going to be sleep deprived and cranky when the baby comes.

An employee approaches the two women.

DRUGSTORE PHARMACIST
Here’s your Twilight.

WOMAN 2
Thanks.

To see the Twilight product, please visit Robsten Lovers

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11 Responses to “Drink Twilight Daily to Avoid Renesmee Monthly”

  • blahblah Says:

    my first impression was “what was this all about?” after i clicked the link, that was hilarious. cant stop laughing on the pill’s label. “no renesmee this month.” :-)

  • twilight Says:

    Thanks, blahblah, for checking this out. I thought it was so funny as well. ;)

  • Isabel Says:

    Haha! I love it!

  • Jime Says:

    funny!
    Those pills should be
    available in all countries XD

  • Ana Lisbeth Says:

    LOL

  • twilightrulez21 Says:

    LMAO!!!! oh my god thts funny.at first i had no clue wat was gonnin on then i pressed the link

  • RobstenLIVES!!! Says:

    haha i cant wait for Breaking Dawn! :D

  • Lala Says:

    Haha can’t stop laughing! I had no idea what was going on so I clicked the link and saw the BC named Twilight! Lmao it could work though..stop teen pregz I mean. Next there will be a Twilight condom that sparkles! Lol I thought about this before I read the comments there so it’s not only me who had this idea!

  • dazzled Says:

    For the love of all things holy!!! Lol! The Twilight Craze will never cease to amaze me! Just when you think they’ve come up with the craziest merch, you’re gobsmacked with another crazier one, haha! Keep em coming guys! ;p

  • Isabella Says:

    HOLLY S—T!!!!!!!!!!!! (omg im sorry im just in shock)….. mother of JESUS! MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!! FOR ALL THAT IS HOLLY!!!! WTF!!!!!!….
    OMG at frist i was like WTF is this this doesn’t make any sense! BUT THEN I CLICKED THE LINK AND OMFG! I FLINCHED IN MY SEAT!!!!!! this is just OMG too much XD the twilight craziness its over the top i cannot belive they are…. Twilight Brith control pills!!!!! what the heck is going on in the world?! XD XD XD XD XD…. no joking this is the most shocking and obsessive merchandise that i have ever seen!!!!!! GOD! XD im XD XD XD XD

  • Caroline13 Says:

    Like u other ppl I was like wth? at first, then i was like,Twilight must mean period, then I clicked the link and was like “OH!LOL” srsly there are plenty of girls who would buy those pills, I can see the commercials now “Don’t be worried during a night with your edward, use Twilight, not for women who are pregnant or women with heart disease,etc.” lol they could put Spunk Ransom on the commercial XD. Really, now instead of purses, ppl carry twilght lunchboxes, and this is true: girls at my school, girls have dumped there bf for Edward. This could put and end to teen pregnancy XD. ok! buhbye, TEAM VOLTURI AND DRACO MALFOY. which reminds me, it was spirit week @ the high school, one day was “dress like a celebrity” day, and my neighbor(10th grader) dressed as draco malfoy, i was like cool! until i relized it was celebrity day and i was like wth Michael dressed as Draco Malfoy for celebrity day,not book character day but celebrity day.Dummy Michael.

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