ATwilightKiss Chats — The Rob Rod vs The Vamp
Photo Courtesy of GQ Magazine
Photo: Nathaniel Goldberg
A Fictitious Sexy Chat between Robert Pattinson and ATwilightKiss Readers In An Alternate Universe Where He’s Not In Love with Kristen Stewart
*giggles* Oh Rob, you have just got to see this! It’s so cute! Look, look, look! It’s white and shiny and everything! Read that description! It’s a “deathly pale flesh tone reminiscent of the new moon’s glow!” Oh, isn’t that romantic? Just like Edward Cullen!
Ohhh wow! Did you read that? “Try taking our Vamp out in the sunlight and watch him sparkle.” It sparkles? Ohhh, I want one!
Oh Rob! It also says that “the Vamp retains hot and cold temperature. Toss it in the fridge for that authentic experience.” That’s it! I’m getting one! Where’s my credit card? Hey, give it back!
What do I want with it? Well, it sparkles for one thing!
Oh baby, I’m so sorry! That was so insensitive of me! Of course, you’re the real thing! Nothing can match your Rob Rod, baby! The Vamp is “long and sleek,” while you’re really humongous and big! The Vamp is cold to the touch while you’re blazing hot! The Vamp sparkles while you’re like, like, uhm…like the sun! Nothing beats the sun, right?
But, baby, you’re not here all the time… How about we look at it as a poor substitute of the Rob Rod?
Eck! What did I say wrong now? I need a demonstration of the Rob Rod?!? Now? In the morning? With sunlight? Wait, will Rob Rod sparkle? Kidding! I’m just kidding! 
Lorna Lopez aka ATwilightKiss Notes
WARNING: The image that you are about to see will, in all likelihood, be offensive. Please use your own discretion.
If you want to know what this post is alluding to, please begin by clicking here.
Dedicated to ATwilightKiss Readers Once again, all the imaginary conversations with Robert Pattinson in this category are dedicated to the ATwilightKiss readers, so enjoy yourself. Imagine you’re the one saying all these things…
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August 22nd, 2009 at 8:14 pm
check this out: How Robsten fell in love http://wp.me/pBxyj-2p
August 22nd, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Umphh.
August 22nd, 2009 at 11:54 pm
Geez… now I’m having an internal debate… can I buy one or is it too much?
LOL
August 23rd, 2009 at 12:23 am
OMG!
August 23rd, 2009 at 12:38 am
Hm, this is strange. I for one will not be buying it but, for all I know this could become popular. Wow, I would laugh really hard if that happened.
August 23rd, 2009 at 3:31 am
OMG!
P.S.Check out my robsten photos!
August 23rd, 2009 at 6:39 am
OMG, haha, you ladies are naughty!!! I want one of those though! Haha!
August 23rd, 2009 at 9:28 am
LMAOOOO, i could see that becoming popular xD
August 23rd, 2009 at 4:05 pm
jajaja
August 23rd, 2009 at 4:19 pm
I may just get one for laughs! xD
August 23rd, 2009 at 4:50 pm
it’s long, sleek and it sparkles… LMAO
August 23rd, 2009 at 4:51 pm
Oh my…
Can you see Rob’s blush (when he sees this)?
Bell re your 2 Qs:
1. you definitely *can*
2. uhm this..you have to answer this yourself
LOL
August 23rd, 2009 at 11:54 pm
Alright.. that is officially THE weirdest piece of merchandice I have EVER seen! LMAO